Sam Alexandra Rose

Tag: amwriting

  • New Story Published Online!

    Hello! I’ve had a short story published in an online zine today. Well, it’s sort of a very short fiction thing based on real life but sort of fictional. It’s metaphorical, which I love, and based on my health experiences and feelings around that. You can find it in issue 12 of Degenerate Literature. Hope you like it, and if it resonates with anyone please let me know – it’s awesome to connect with people who have had similar feelings and experiences!

  • Top 10 Cancer Blog of 2016!

    I’m so pleased to say that this blog has been named one of the top ten cancer blogs of 2016!

    The lovely people over at IHadCancer.com listed their ten top cancer blogs of last year, and out of hundreds of submissions, mine was one of the top ten!

    So, I can now say I’m officially an award-winning blogger, right?! I’m even gonna get a badge to put on my blog and everything.

    I mean, when I submitted my blog for consideration I didn’t even know it was for an award type thing, I just thought they were putting a list of resources together. And I thought my blog would be too poem-y and not quite as bloggy as others to merit consideration. So this is really cool.

    And best of all, it’s really inspired me and motivated me to keep writing, and blogging, and posting my poetry. I feel appreciated and like what I do matters, and that is the best start to the new year I could have gotten. So a huge thank you to the guys and girls at IHC – it might sound silly but this really means a lot. You’ll all be hearing a lot more from me in 2017. This is my year.

    I can see I’m in great company, and it’s really cool to be connecting to other cancer bloggers on Twitter, too. You can see the list of all the top ten blogs and special mentions on the IHadCancer.com website.

  • Where Nessie Lives

    it’s not that far to go
    it lurks just below the surface
    like the loch ness monster.
    everyone else thinks it’s fictional,
    a figment of my imagination,
    because they’ve never seen it.
    but I have, I’ve felt the waves rush
    to the river bank as it moved,
    I’ve reached out and touched it
    oily skin, its skin much thicker
    than mine. I’ve negotiated its humps
    as it invited me aboard its back, I’ve
    felt the powerful swish of its tail,
    I’ve held on for dear life as it moved –
    because it felt like it was all I had,
    and it understood. it was no mirage
    to me, and it still lurks there now.
    I know I can revisit it at any time,
    sometimes unwillingly. sometimes
    I go there just so it doesn’t sneak up
    on me. Nessie is always there.

    I know there is a starry sky up there
    somewhere, but for now I’d rather
    cling onto Nessie. it’s a comfortable
    fear down here, and she knows me
    best, now that she’s shaped me,
    manipulated me, turned me into a
    mirror of herself, a shadow of me.
    the water is hypnotising. it would
    be so easy to dip a toe in, even though
    it’s cold, even though it hurts, even
    though it’s the darkest place I’ve
    ever seen. the temptation is great
    for no logical reason other than to
    feel so deeply.
    the water runs so deep
    and Nessie is the way in.

    she is
    easily accessible fear
    trepidation on tap
    anger on demand

    there is
    a pool of trauma
    hidden in this lake
    where Nessie lives.

    Nessie says ‘tumour markers’
    and I panic, stop functioning,
    struggle to catch my breath,
    just sit and glaze over like these
    words are mine, thrust upon me –
    and why don’t they belong to
    others around me too? – but
    they don’t, they’re just mine
    and I have to handle it. so I
    take a deep breath, grasp onto
    it. the consultant says he’s
    sending me for a tumour marker
    blood test and I say okay as if it’s
    fine, and it sort of is, because
    I’m strong enough. I could carry
    Nessie herself – instead of bobbing
    in the water as she takes me
    wherever she wants me to go
    because she is in control – so
    yes, I could carry her weight
    but I wish I didn’t have to.

  • Professor Green

    Every time I listen to Professor Green’s music or watch one of his interviews, I feel so inspired to write something, to be brutally honest, to open up a blank Word document and spill my guts and share it with the world. Pro inspires me to write more than any author does, because he inspires me to be honest and open and to be myself, unapologetically. And for me that’s the most important part of writing, that I say something that’s important to me, and that writing it down makes me feel good, even empowered. He gives me self-confidence in that way. He makes me feel like if I have fingers and a pen or a keyboard, then I can do anything.

  • Publication Notice: Scarlet Leaf Review

    I had a short story published in Scarlet Leaf Review today! It’s called Mirrors and I’m really pleased because it’s the first short story I’ve ever had published, as opposed to poetry and memoirs. Here it is, if you’re looking for a quick read – hope you enjoy!

    http://www.scarletleafreview.com/shortstoriesoct2016/category/sam-rose

  • New Interview With Me!

    Jim Harrington over at “Six Questions For…” has kindly posted an interview with me on his blog. It’s an interview about editing Peeking Cat Poetry Magazine and The Creative Truth, including how the magazines got started and what I look for in submissions.

    Here it is:

    http://sixquestionsfor.blogspot.co.uk/2016/10/six-questions-for-sam-samantha-rose.html

    Enjoy! 🙂

  • Maybe

    Maybe I was wrong
    Maybe I am the person
    I wanted to be.

    I don’t mind being wrong.

  • Publication Notice

    I just found out that one of my short stories is being published in an online magazine in October!

    This is awesome because I’m pretty proud of the story and have submitted it to a few places but it got rejected. Also it’s the first short story I’ve had published – usually I’m submitting poetry or the occasional memoir piece. So I’m really pleased!

    The story is called ‘Mirrors’ and it’s going to be published in Scarlet Leaf Review. I’ve been feeling a bit run down today as well so this is a lovely bit of news to brighten up my day!

  • easy saturday

    The stormy bank holiday when
    plans fell through so it was
    Scrabble and a fry up, lazy Saturday
    afternoon with my legs outstretched
    and your half of the sofa reclined, your
    heartbeat reverberating through the
    backs of my knees as you snored and I
    watched easy tv

  • not your average wednesday

    ‘easy, easy’
    they say,
    when nothing is easy

    and my eye welcomes
    the comfort of my
    fingertip
    and says this is a
    pressing matter

    and I’ve buried myself in bricks
    for days
    hard thoughts
    heavy thoughts
    thoughts that leave no room for
    anything else at all

    and I sink
    and I sink
    and my thoughts are nothing but
    this

    and the day comes that
    I’ve been waiting for
    and I’m going alone
    like I wanted
    but didn’t want
    and it happens
    and it’s okay
    probably
    maybe

    and it’s over

    and just like that
    the bricks are gone
    I’m still on my own
    but comfortably so
    and I can stand
    and there is light
    air all around
    no dusk or dawn

    just like a switch
    midnight to midday sun

    and everything feels fine –
    until next time.