Sam Rose - writer, geek, music lover, cancer survivor, optimist, Buddhist.

Tag: shy

the socially awkward cycle

I think I feel self-conscious because I’m quiet. It’s not that I’m quiet because I’m anxious – my quietness is making me anxious. I am socially awkward because I am socially awkward. My very nature is doing this to me. What a riveting cycle.

I worry that when I’m quiet people will think I am boring and won’t want to hang around with me anymore. I don’t have any past experience to base this on except for one thing someone said about me and a friend parroted back to me when we were about seventeen. Yet it still makes me paranoid. So, that’s my personal discovery for the day, what was yours? Hopefully something a bit nicer.

Straightening out 10 assumptions* people make about me because I’m quiet, none of which are true

I’m not shy

I don’t have low confidence

I don’t prefer quiet environments

I am usually quite happy and cheerful

I don’t dislike you (probably)

I’m not bored (probably)

I’m not mysterious or thinking deep thoughts

I don’t need you to speak up for me or talk to other people for me

I don’t need you to help me to be louder or to invite me to talk

Calling me quiet like it’s a bad thing (or doing any of thesedoes make me want to hit you

*emphasis on the ASS

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